Sunday, April 03, 2016

Who Is the Girl in the El Dorado Spa Resorts & Hotels by Karisma TV Ad?

Often times a long journey can lead you back to the beginning. Such was the case in my quest to uncover the model featured in the El Dorado Spa Resorts & Hotels by Karisma TV ad.
Katie Luddy for El Dorado Maroma
You know the one, she's wearing a white string bikini, leaning against a four-poster bed on a sandy beach, watching a man in blue boardshorts approach. It's a stunning ad, produced by Dorn Martell from Tinsley Advertising with original music by John Jay Martyn and Jimi Ruccolo on guitar. I uncovered all of these contributors, including the voice-over-artist, Jodi Krangle, in my search for the woman in the white bikini.

What prompted me to set sail on this odyssey? While the sensuous ad targeting the luxury traveler was the vehicle, the catalyst was as ancient as Helen of Troy, desire.

"I wish that was my butt," said my wife. 

"Me, too," I said. But whose butt is it?

Katie Luddy for El Dorado Maroma
A Google search led to countless other searches, taking apart the ad over and over again on YouTube, going through stacks of portfolios on Instagram of models featured under the #karismaexperience banner, all to no avail. The pursuit was maddening. I'd throw my hands up in disgust or pause due to waning battery power. If I was researching a cure for cancer, one might understand my being overzealous, but the owner of a perfect posterior? It was crazy.

I was beaten. My ego was bruised. I pressed on.

With many unsolved mysteries, one has to assemble evidence and weigh it against the known facts to draw a conclusion. Even when this occurs, the researcher is always haunted by a lingering doubt, how can I be sure?

My conclusion is that the woman in the white bikini is 27-year-old model Katie Luddy from Rochester, NY via Miami, FL. While I have written to Katie via comment on Instagram, I haven't heard back (I completely understand, there are a lot of creeps and weirdos online). And so, dear reader, I submit my evidence for you to see for yourself.

Katie Luddy via Facebook from April 2014
The long journey to uncover the woman in the white bikini has ended. It spanned several continents, multiple locations and many languages before leading me back to Katie Luddy, who, as it turns out, is a fellow alumnus of the University at Buffalo, where she studied architecture and design before moving to Miami to allow the world to study her own architecture and design. 

After all of this toil and the satisfaction of a job-well-done from my wife, I could use a vacation.

If only I knew where to go.


Katie Luddy by Max Foto Sudios

Katie Luddy has the last laugh via Instagram
  





Monday, February 29, 2016

February Comes and Goes

February comes and goes
Where the days go noboby knows
March comes in like a hungry lion 
to eat President's Day leftovers nobody's buyin
Beware the Ides says Great Caesar's ghost
or was it a Hollywood Oscar host?
Easter risin like a cat on a spring
jumpin upon you like a sudden fling
Pollinating flowers into new born buds
Sittin on a cooler knockin back suds 
The days grow longer with nothing to do
The heat presses down on your frizzy hair-do
The leaves change and the air grows brisk
while Wall Street portfolios mitigate the risk
The holidays swirl and smack you like a tornado
New Year's Eve ball drops at midnight, wait though ...
I haven't had time to change my clothes
Another February comes and goes.

Dog at Greenwich Point Park, Conn. | Photo: Bob Luckey

Sunday, January 31, 2016

Man Escapes Office Run by Zombies

NEW YORK, Jan. 31 -- A young man was rescued from a local business in Midtown yesterday that was run by brain-eating zombies.

"At first I didn't realize I was among the undead. There was not a lot of chit chat in the office and coworkers seemed to stare blankly at their screens all day. It was similar to my last job," he said.

The young man would see coworkers assemble and leave the office together around lunchtime, but only a few would return. These coworkers along with his managers often walked by him as if he was invisible.  
Image credit: Daniel Hollister | Flickr

"I said hello to one woman each day who was always standing by the coffee machine, although no coffee ever seemed to come out of it," he said. 

He reports the work was mindless and that his biggest challenge was remembering his Windows login. 

"When I'd struggle to remember my password, a crowd of coworkers would gather near my cubicle and grunt at one another, but once I logged in, they'd vanish," he said. 

It was when the young man had trouble with his login and called tech support that a coworker lunged at him from a nearby cubicle. 

"She was trying to bite me," he said

When he ran to human resources to report the incident, other coworkers poured out of meeting rooms and offices giving chase. When he got there, the administrators leaped across their desks firing employee manuals toward his head. He was able to duck down and exit through a nearby fire escape out to the street. 

"I thought the incident was strange, but I still wasn't sure if I had to report back the next day," he said.

After describing the scene to a friend, the young man alerted the authorities who discovered the office was a zombie lair. 

The NYPD held a press conference saying that zombies were hiring young, unsuspecting professionals to feed on their brains and incorporate them into their occult.

"Once the supply of new brains ran low, all hell broke loose," said Sergeant O'Leary.  He cautioned citizens that other zombie dens were likely in operation, luring new hires to join their "growing company."


Thursday, December 31, 2015

Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin No Longer a Secret

It's been two years since I predicted The Ascendancy of Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin, so it's time to take inventory. To date, the celebrity scorecard still has the Jenners and Kardashians leading the popularity contest, but the margin is dwindling. Last month, Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin crashed the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show in New York with Ireland apparently leaving her lingerie behind in the dressing room. This spawn of Hollywood royalty is serious in its pursuit of modeling and acting and draws hordes of paparazzi by birthright. While the emergence of Ireland's cousin, Hailey Baldwin, and the increasing popularity of Gigi and Bella Hadid prove formidable, the glowing embers of  this dynamic duo are beginning to fan into flames and ascend the nation's tabloid rankings. Take a look:

Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin at Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2015.

Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin at Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2015.

Dylan Penn and Ireland Baldwin at Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2015.

Monday, November 30, 2015

Too Much, Not Enough

The choices that confront us today are confounding: products, recipes, TV shows, cocktail parties, radio stations, sporting events and so on ... The weight of deciding is bone crushing, sending us to those safe harbors we construct such as snack cabinets and wine cellars. Too much of anything is dangerous and not enough of it is maddening.

In the past week, I raked the leaves on the yard, fixed the gaping hole in the side of the house, roasted a 22-pound turkey, replaced the hard drive on my computer and had a heartfelt debate about elementary education. If asked how I accomplished any of it, I would shrug my shoulders and say "YouTube,"

The inundation of how-to's and DIYs are possible now that we can download information quickly from the cloud and not worry about storing it past the point of immediate need. My brain can only handle so much: address, social security number, kids' names, outcome of the Florida State vs. Florida game (Noles won!) before the distraction of what's for lunch pushes it all aside.

The horrible events in our country and around the planet are brought to us immediately and replayed countless times by news organizations for shock value. Helpless, we look to politicians to correct these ails and protect us while they lobby for our trust. It's a game of Whack-A-Mole. Push one problem down, another immediately takes its place, it's too much.

As I write, the view from my window is lit with color and stillness. It's quiet and peaceful outside. just not enough.

Saturday, October 31, 2015

The Words

It used to be the words
dripped off my pen like honey,
now it seems they're only
in it for the money
They come and go
as they please,
proving to be no more
than a tease
At times they'll
disturb my sleep,
coming on in torrents that
appear too deep
Moved by the fear that
I may drown,
I reach for a pen to
write them down
Then I get the feeling that
they're only using me,
waking me from my sleep
to set them free.

                                Jan. 15, 1998